Ajahn Brahm

《平靜自己等於平靜他人》《calming down ourselves equals calming down others》

《calming down ourselves equals calming down others》

I remember this one lady, no other monk would be able to talk with her, and she would come on the telephone...I think someone knows who I'm talking about, and she would swear, F-words, bloody words, "Bloody monks, I'm going to come up there with an M-16 and shoot you all."

I said, "OK, that's a nice thing to do." [laughter]

I understood her. No, she's a really difficult person, but because I have never reacted back, because I always react in kindness, she always loved me and said,"You're the only person who understands me," and of course she never came to the monastery with an M-16 to shoot us all.

She was just taking out her venom on someone who would listen and not take it seriously.

I could understand where she was coming from, the pain of her life, the difficulties of her life and embracing her for who she was. Then she'd calm down, become very peaceful and tell me all about her life, a very painful difficult life. She was not a problem. She was not a difficulty. As I understood myself, I could understand her.

You can actually calm down the so called difficult people in this world when you have learned how to calm down yourself. Then everybody in the world is not difficult anymore. It's not as if they continue those bad habits which other people think asdifficult. Because you can calm them down, accept them peacefully, they don't need to express that difficulty anymore in those dysfunctional ways.

《平靜自己等於平靜他人》

我記得有一位女士，沒有其他僧侶能和她交談，她會打電話來……我想有人知道我在說誰，她會咒罵，使用髒話，“該死的僧侶，我要帶著M-16來那裡把你們都射了。”

我說：“好吧，這是一件很好的事情。”[笑聲]

我理解她。不，她真的是一個難相處的人，但因為我從未對她做出反應，因為我總是以善意回應，她總是喜歡我，說：“你是唯一懂我的人。”當然，她從來沒有帶著M-16來寺院射我們。

她只是把她的怨恨發洩在一個願意傾聽且不會當真的人身上。

我能理解她的處境，理解她生活中的痛苦和困難，並接納她的本來面目。然後她就會平靜下來，變得非常安詳，告訴我她的生活，一段非常痛苦艱難的生活。她不是一個問題。她不是一個困難的人。當我理解自己時，我也能理解她。

其實，當你學會讓自己平靜下來時，你可以讓這個世界上所謂的難相處的人平靜下來。然後這個世界上的每個人都不再難相處。並不是說他們會繼續那些被其他人認為是困難的壞習慣。因為你可以讓他們平靜下來，平和地接納他們，他們不需要再以那些不健康的方式表現出困難。

---阿姜布拉姆

《負面情緒讓你變得難以相處》《Negativity makes you a difficult person》

《Negativity makes you a difficult person》

when you get sort of negative, you do become a difficult person to live with, so know that whatever you have to do in life, you embrace it, have fun withit. If you teach a person to have fun with the difficulties of life, to embrace them, then you'll find that you never get a difficult character.

Seeing a person who is a difficult person to live with, it is because they're fighting their life. They're angry at just what life gives them, and they're probably working too hard, "Why do I have to do all of this? Why does all these things happened to me? Why is this life so tough for me?" and they take it out on you, and all the other people they live with.

Hope I never take it out on the monks which I live with. Instead, you just embrace it, take it on board, it's just life. You can't change life, but as I said many times,you can always change the attitude you have to life. It's an attitude problem we have, that's all. What's wrong with working hard? You can only do one thing at a time,that's all we ever do. That's why we never get angry at people not turning off their mobile phones, we embrace that. [laughter]

Thank you so much for giving me an opportunity to explain just how you can embrace the difficulties of life. [laughter]

Look, I had a choice, I could get angry at someone not turning offtheir mobile phone, but why get angry for? It's already been turned on, big deal, so you don't get angry at life, you just embrace it. People make mistakes. I make mistakes. I made abig mistake, I hope she's not here today. Last Sunday I was doing a marriage service forone of the people who comes here regularly, and she's married to a nice young boy.You always have to get married to a boy, I suppose, if you're a girl. [laughter]

I don't know why I said that, but anyway she was getting married...[laughter]

...and after the service, doing the blessing service, and I said to him...That's right, this elderly man came to stand next to him, and I said, "Oh, is that your father?"

And the old man said, "No, I'm the best man." [laughter]

He was not very happy at me. [laughter]

Well, like I was telling a funeral director on...When was it? On Wednesday, or Tuesday...Thursday, Thursday, yesterday. I was telling the funeral director about one of the funerals I did once for a couple who comes here. One of their parents died. I'm doing the funeral service and saying, "Oh, it's such a shame that your mother passed away, she was such a good Buddhist, and she'd done so much."

Then this old lady stood up at the back and said, "It's not me, it's my husband. I'm alive! It's he who's dead." [laughter]

I do stupid things many times. [laughter]

But when you make a stupid thing, instead of getting tense about it and being a difficult person, you laugh at life. I actually try and collect all my stupid mistakes, and try and tell you all about them... [laughter]

...so that you laugh. When you make a mistake, it's like a wonderful opportunity to make people laugh. That's why one of the sayings, "When you ever make a stupid mistake, and people laugh, you laugh as well, because then the world never laughs at you, it only laughs with you."

So we laugh as well at the stupidity of life and making a mistake, and that way we embrace and accept things, even the difficult things, and we don't become a difficult person.

No matter what you have to deal with, you can embrace and make it work, so if you learn that, then you're not one of the difficult people in life. It's always other people who are difficult. No matter who those other people are. They're us, so when we learn how not to be difficult, we can maybe give those skills to other people,but not be so demanding of life by having an attitude which is more accepting of life.

《負面情緒讓你變得難以相處》

當你變得有些負面時，你確實會成為一個難以相處的人，所以要知道，無論你在生活中要做什麼，請擁抱它，享受它。如果你教會一個人如何在生活的困難中找到樂趣，並擁抱這些困難，那麼你會發現自己永遠不會變得難以相處。

看到一個難以相處的人，是因為他們在與生活抗爭。他們對生活所給予的感到生氣，可能還在拼命工作，心裡想：“為什麼我必須做這些？為什麼這一切都發生在我身上？為什麼我的生活對我來說如此艱難？”他們將這些情緒發泄在你和其他與他們生活在一起的人身上。

希望我永遠不會把這些情緒發泄在與我一起的僧侶身上。相反，你只是擁抱它，接受它，這就是生活。你無法改變生活，但正如我多次所說，你始終可以改變自己對生活的態度。這是一個態度問題，僅此而已。努力工作有什麼錯？你只能一次做一件事，這就是我們所做的。所以我們從不會因為人們不關掉他們的手機而生氣，我們接受這一點。[笑聲]

非常感謝你給我這個機會來解釋如何擁抱生活的困難。[笑聲]

你看，我有選擇，我可以因為有人不關掉手機而生氣，但為什麼要生氣呢？它已經開著，這有什麼大不了的，所以你不要對生活生氣，你只是擁抱它。人們會犯錯，我會犯錯。我犯了一個大錯，我希望她今天不在這裡。上週日，我為一位經常來這裡的人主持婚禮，她嫁給了一位好小伙子。對於女孩來說，你總是要嫁給一個男孩，我想。[笑聲]

我不知道為什麼我會這麼說，但不管怎樣，她正在結婚……[笑聲]

……在儀式結束後，在祝福儀式上，我對他說……對的，這位老先生走到他身邊，我說：“哦，那是你的父親嗎？”

老先生說：“不，我是伴郎。”[笑聲]
他對我不太高興。[笑聲]

好吧，就像我告訴一位殯葬主任的……什麼時候來著？在星期三，或者星期二……星期四，昨天。我告訴殯葬主任關於我曾經為一對經常來這裡的人主持的葬禮。他們的父母去世了。我正在主持葬禮，說：“哦，你母親去世真可惜，她是一位很好的佛教徒，做了很多事情。”

然後這位老婦人在後面站起來說：“不是我，是我丈夫。我還活著！是他死了。”[笑聲]

我經常會做愚蠢的事情。[笑聲]

但當你犯了愚蠢的錯誤時，不要對此感到緊張，成為一個難以相處的人，而是要對生活發笑。我其實試著收集所有的愚蠢錯誤，並試著告訴你們所有的……[笑聲]

……這樣你們就可以笑了。當你犯錯時，這就像是一個讓人發笑的絕佳機會。這就是為什麼有一句話：“當你犯了一個愚蠢的錯誤，人們笑了，你也笑了，因為這樣世界就不會嘲笑你，而是和你一起笑。”

所以我們也要對生活的愚蠢和錯誤發笑，這樣我們才能擁抱和接受一切，即使是困難的事情，我們也不會變得難以相處。

無論你必須面對什麼，你都可以擁抱並讓它運作，所以如果你學會了這一點，那麼你就不是生活中那些難以相處的人。總是其他人才是難以相處的。無論那些其他人是誰。它們就是我們，所以當我們學會如何不變得難以相處時，我們也許可以把這些技能傳授給其他人，但對生活的要求不再那麼苛刻，擁有一種更能接受生活的態度。

---阿姜布拉姆

《如何避免自己成為一個難相處的人》《How to prevent ourselves being a difficult person》

《How to prevent ourselves being a difficult person》

One of the reasons why people are difficult, why sometimes you are difficult, is because people are too stressed out. When you're stressed out at work, you take it back home, give people a hard time at home, and then because you have a hard time at home, you have family problems, when you go back to work, you're stressed out at work even before you begin your day.

You are in the cycle of negativity and stress, so much so that we reallyshould deal with that problem, whether at home, or at work, to learn how to de-stress, and to be able to de-stress a little bit of meditation really works.

You know the old story, how heavy is a cup? The longer I hold it, the heavierit feels,

if I keep holding this for five minutes, my arm aches, 10 minutes, I'm in great pain.

If I keep holding this for half an hour, I'm a very stupid monk. [laughter]

What should I do when it starts to get heavy? Put it down for five minutes. If you don't believe me, you can try this out at home. [laughs] It works, after five minutes , you pick it up again, it's much lighter. It feels lighter. It's exactly the same weight, it feels lighter because you have rested. Your stress is nothing to do with how much work you have.

The amount of responsibilities and duties you have, that is not the cause of stress.

The cause of stress is when it gets too heavy to bear, you don't know how to put it down.

You're afraid of putting it down for a few minutes, to rest, to get your energies and strength back up, and you will find, as any psychologist or monk will tell you...actually, we teach the psychologists, that's where they got all their ideas from.[laughter] We should patent them, but we give things out for free.

This is the work you have. You find if you put it down for 5 or 10minutes,

it's not 5 or 10 minutes wasted, it's actually an investment of time. Because when you're rested, afterwards, the quality of your work improves enormously. You get more done in less time too. You become more efficient, and sometimes at work we mistake the quantity of work for its quality and efficiency.

Giving yourself a break, 10 minutes of meditation, rest, or whatever, and I recommend the toilet is a great place to meditate. [laughter]

You can put on, "engaged" there, no one will bother you, and you can always say you were constipated. You're not lying, because your brain was constipated.[laughter]

Then rest for a few minutes. When you come out afterwards, you make up that 10 minutes you spent in the loo very quickly, so you get more work done, more efficiency, higher quality, and you're not stressed out.

So when you go home, you can enjoy the company of your relations, and know your kids, and your wife, your husband, and even actually relax and enjoy your dinner.Because when you enjoy the company of home...again, home is supposed to be a place where youde-stress, you can relax, have a good dinner, and meet the people you love and care for.

When you have a nice rest in the evening, you go back to work in the morning, then you're sort of calm. It's a cycle which you can either have a vicious cycle of stress and argument at home, or stress at work, and you get really crazy, or you can break thatcycle, rest a little bit at work. You get more done, you come home, you relax, everythingis going well at home so you...happy at work as well. You get more done there.

That's a cycle where you don't become a difficult person to live with. That'swhy I say to people when they come on meditation retreats, they're doing meditation here on a Saturday afternoon, or beforehand, "Why do you meditate?" Because other people have to putup with you. [laughter]

That's one of the great reasons to meditate, and if you meditate,you're a much nicer person afterwards. Many times when I've been teaching meditation,especially down at Armadale, I don't know why this happens always in Armadale group. In Armadale group, sometimes after the meditation, talking to people afterwards, and veryoften people say, "You know, this evening, I never wanted to come."

"It's Tuesday evening, I've been at work, and I'm tired, and I told my kids I'm not going this evening, and my daughter said, 'Mommy, you must go tomeditation.'

I said, 'I don't feel like it darling, I'm tired.' 'Mommy, you must go to meditation!'

'No, not this evening.'

'Mommy, go to meditation!!'

'Why darling?'

'Because you're a much nicer mommy when you come back.'" [laughter]

So they go. Many of the kids actually understand that. They can see the change in you when you're de-stress, so you're not such a difficult mother or a difficult father to your own kids. This is actually how you can see in practice, a little bit of rest makes people less difficult people to live with.

You see, in the course of these things, so it's not just being compassionate and kind, it's actually knowing the causes of being difficult, and dealing with them by giving yourself a bit of rest, being de-stressed.

《如何避免自己成為一個難相處的人》

人們為什麼會變得難以相處，有時你自己也會變得難以相處，原因之一就是因為壓力太大。當你在工作上感到壓力時，這種壓力會帶回家，給家人帶來困擾，然後因為在家裡的困擾，你又會有家庭問題，當你回到工作時，即使在一天的開始之前，你已經感到壓力重重。

你陷入了負面的循環和壓力之中，因此我們真的應該解決這個問題，無論是在家還是在工作，學會如何減壓，而一些禪修的練習確實能幫助你減壓。

你知道那個老故事，杯子的重量是多少？我握著它的時間越長，感覺越重。

如果我握著它五分鐘，我的手臂會感到疼痛，十分鐘後，我會感到非常痛苦。

如果我一直握著它半小時，那我就是一個非常愚蠢的和尚。[笑聲]

當它開始變得沉重時，我應該怎麼做？放下五分鐘。如果你不相信我，可以在家試試看。[笑聲] 這是有效的，五分鐘後再拿起來，會感覺輕多了。它的重量並沒有變，卻因為你休息過而感覺輕鬆。你的壓力與你有多少工作無關。

你的責任和義務的數量並不是壓力的根源。

壓力的根源在於當你無法承受時，你不知道如何放下。

你害怕放下幾分鐘，去休息，恢復精力和力量，你會發現，正如任何心理學家或僧侶會告訴你的……其實，我們教了心理學家，這就是他們所有想法的來源。[笑聲] 我們應該為此申請專利，但我們免費提供這些。

這是你所承擔的工作。你會發現，如果你放下五或十分鐘，

這不是浪費的五或十分鐘，而實際上是時間的投資。因為當你得到休息後，隨之而來的工作質量會大大提高。你能在更少的時間內完成更多的工作。你變得更有效率，有時在工作上，我們會錯誤地將工作量與質量和效率混淆。

給自己一個休息，十分鐘的禪修，休息或其他什麼，我建議廁所是一個很好的禪修地點。[笑聲]

你可以在那裡“忙碌”，沒有人會打擾你，你也總是可以說你便秘了。你並不是在說謊，因為你的大腦確實是“便秘”的。[笑聲]

然後休息幾分鐘。當你出來後，你會很快彌補在廁所花的那十分鐘，這樣你能完成更多的工作，效率更高，質量更高，同時你不會感到壓力。

這樣當你回到家時，你可以享受與家人的相處，了解你的孩子，妻子或丈夫，甚至真正放鬆地享受你的晚餐。因為當你享受家庭的陪伴時……家庭應該是一個讓你減壓的地方，你可以放鬆，享受美好的晚餐，與你愛和關心的人相聚。

當你在晚上得到良好的休息，早上回到工作時，你的心情會平靜。這是一個循環，你可以選擇要麼陷入惡性的壓力和家庭爭吵，要麼在工作中稍微休息一下。你能做得更多，回到家後放鬆，家庭一切都很好，這樣你在工作上也會感到開心。你能在那裡做得更多。

這是一個讓你不成為難相處的人的循環。這就是為什麼我對來參加禪修營的人說，在星期六下午或之前，他們在這裡禪修，“你為什麼禪修？”因為其他人必須忍受你。[笑聲]

這是禪修的一個重要原因，如果你禪修，之後你會變得更加友好。很多次在我教禪修的時候，特別是在阿馬代爾小組，我不知道為什麼這總是在阿馬代爾小組發生。有時在禪修後，與禪員交談，很多人說：“你知道，今晚我根本不想來。”

“今天是星期二晚上，我在工作，感到疲憊，我告訴我的孩子我今晚不去，我的女兒說，‘媽媽，你一定要去禪修。’

我說，‘我不想去，親愛的，我累了。’‘媽媽，你一定要去禪修！’
‘不，今晚不去。’
‘媽媽，去禪修！！’
‘為什麼，親愛的？’
‘因為你回來後會變得更好。’”[笑聲]

所以他們去了。很多孩子其實都明白這一點。他們能看到你在減壓後的變化，這樣你就不會成為孩子們難相處的母親或父親。這實際上是你可以在實踐中看到的，休息一下會讓人變得不那麼難相處。

你看，在這些事情的過程中，不僅僅是表現出同情和善良，更是了解變得難相處的原因，並通過給自己一些休息來解決這些問題，讓自己減壓。

《大善可以轉化惡人》《Immense kindness can convert a bad person》

《Immense kindness can convert a bad person》

One of the first time, 20 years ago, when I told this story it was when I asteaching in prison, in Karnet Prison Farm, just down the road from my ministry. We still go there most Fridays.

When I was teaching that at Karnet Prison Farm one of the prisoners complained and he said, "That is just new age rubbish. It doesn't work in the real world,especially in a prison. Prisons are tough places. If you've got a difficult person you've got to standup for yourself. That's the only language they understand."

Of course, I wasn't having any of that. I said, "I don't believe you." He said,"You don't live in prison." I said, "Monastery we have cells, we have wall around."Actually, they don't have a wall around Karnet but we have a wall around our monastery. Sometimes people, in the early years, they used to drive to Karnet Prison Farm and ask where are the monks. It was very embarrassing. Luckily, there weren't any monks in it.

Anyway, I challenged this guy and said, "In this prison, who is the most difficult person you have to deal with?" The prisoner I challenged was with a number of other prisoners. He said, "The chief officer. The chief officer, my job is to serve him tea and coffee every day. That's my job in prison. I hate that guy. He's always really nasty."

He told me a story which happened a week before. One of the prisoners inKarnet, he had hardly ever had a visit from his family because it's such a hard place to get to.There's no public transport and if you're poor and haven't got a car you have to find a friend who can actually take you all that way. It's a difficult place to get to.

He said this man's wife had managed to get a lift to come and see him, but before you can go and see your relations in prison you have to check in, say your name, go through all the security stuff.

The chief officer had seen this woman checking in and knew that she had come to see this prisoner and decided to be cruel to the prisoner.

On the PA system he said so-and-so, I've got a job for you on the other side of Karnet Prison Farm and sent him to a place where the PA system didn't reach. It's a huge prison farm. He did it on purpose because as soon as his wife had checked in the PA system, he announced, 'prisoner so-and-so, your wife is here, please go to the visitor's area' . But he couldn't hear it from where he had been sent.

The message was repeated two or three times. There was a search to try and find him. They did find him. By the time they found him and he came back visiting hoursare over. Better luck next time. He said, "The chief officer did this on purpose with no reason other than spite and trying to give the prisoners a harder time than they deserved.That's why, in that time in prison, he was called a dog."

I said, "You hate him?" He said, "Yes. Really big time. He's so difficult. He never respects us, never says anything to us. He always puts us down and treats us like dirt." I said, "Great. This is a challenge. You meet him every day serving tea and coffee.Be kind to him. Don't embrace him with your arms, you'll get in trouble that way,but at least you can embrace him with your heart."

I said, "How you can do that is every time you serve him some tea and coffee try and put some love and care in that tea or coffee. Try and make it the most beautiful, delicious cup of coffee you possibly can make. Find out what he likes and be kind. Get lots of love and compassion whenever you serve him tea and coffee."

So all credit to this prisoner, he tried it, for a week. When I came back afterone week, "How is it going?"

He said, "It's a complete waste of time. I'm trying really hard to be kind to this guy , but every time, even if I put lots of effort into making a nice cup of tea and coffee, he completely ignores me as if I don't exist, as if I'm lower than a cockroach.He even says to the cockroach get out of here, but not me."

I told him, "Carry on." It was about, I'm not sure how long, maybe a couple of months, I had to encourage him and force him to do this, before we got what I call the big breakthrough.

One day I actually came to visit and he couldn't wait to tell me this.

He said, he'd made this prison officer a beautiful cup of coffee with cream or whatever he found, just the type he thought the prison officer liked, and managed to find him some biscuits which he noticed the prison officer liked, and he said, "Here you are sir, have this coffee, and I've found some special biscuits which I know you like," and the prison officer said, "Er." He grunted. That was our breakthrough. [laughter]

It was the first time he acknowledged that this prisoner actually lived and existed and breathed. That grunt, I said, "Wow, this is exciting!" That is the crack in the dam wall.

I was right. It was only about two or three weeks later the prisoner managed to find a special cup of tea, a sandwich or whatever, handed it to this prison officer,the chief officer, who was a dog, and the chief officer turned around and said, "Thankyou."

All the other prisoners were telling me this and they were all looking at me and they said,

"You don't realize just how the prison grapevine works. That has gone to every prison in the state." That this chief officer could say thank you to a prisoner was unbelievable.

I won the challenge. I knew I'd win eventually. Even such a dog you can change into a cuddly little puppy with lots and lots and lots of kindness.

You can turn difficult people around, but it just takes a lot and lot of patience, a lot of kindness. Some of you will not be able to do that. It's too much for you. You have to know your limitations. But it does work if you really push at it. The most difficult people can become the best of your friends. Sometimes it's a challenge which is worth

facing in life. You have people in the office. Give them kindness.

When they give unkindness back to you and difficulty to you, know your limitations.

If you have to run away, fine. If you have to, talk to them and point out what it feels like. What I talked about this afternoon in a conference is also what I talked about here, the old sandwich technique.

If you do have to tell a person you're being difficult to me, I have my own space that I need to protect, you don't go blurting out the negative stuff straight away.

That will never work.

Whenever you are talking to someone and want to bring up a difficult problem, in other words to criticize them, to tell them they're making a problem for you,sandwich technique.

Two or three pieces of praise, first of all. You're a really nice person, you're so diligent, you're so well dressed or whatever, somethingwhich praises them, and then you tell them.

Say you want to criticize me. You say, "Ajahn Brahm, you're such a nice monk, coming all the time, giving these talks, and they're very inspiring. When you say things like that I open up to you. You lighten me. I'm listening to you." Then you say, "But your jokes are sometimes a bit over the top, but I know that you do look after the monasteries and look after the Buddhist society." You praise afterwards.

If you actually sandwich your criticism between heaps and heaps of praise,people actually listen to it. If you are dealing with a difficult person and you really need to tell them, they really need to listen to you to know exactly what they're doing and the problems they're causing, please praise them first of all. Get on their right side. Then they know they're not being attacked.

Push this back at you. Isn't that what you need when you're being told off because you are difficult people, as well? Sometimes aren't you? It's always somebody else. Sometimes we create difficulties for others. If I was going to tell you off, this is how I would do it. I'd praise you,

first of all, butter you up, make you know that I appreciate and value andcare for you.

If you just give criticism straight away ;what we feel if we are that person will be--why are they my enemy?

Why are they just saying this to me? Don't they realize how hard I work andthe difficulties and the problems I have to face? When you get criticism straight away you just get defensive,

you justify yourself, and you don't listen to the other person. You don't take it on-board.

By getting that acceptance, the very fact that you're accepted, you're appreciated, you're valued means you're opening up.

Then you put the criticism in and you butter over

afterwards. I really like you, you're really valued, thank you for being who you are.

Then people actually can listen. A lot of times people don't realize they're being difficult to you. It's weird, but they think they're being a friend. They think they're being them or they're being funny or they're being whatever. Sometimes we do need feedback to know exactly whatwe're doing and how we come across.

《大善可以轉化惡人》

二十年前，我第一次講這個故事的時候是在監獄裡教書，地點是卡內特監獄農場，就在我的部門附近。我們幾乎每個星期五都會去那裡。

在卡內特監獄農場教書時，有一名囚犯抱怨說：“這只是新時代的垃圾。在現實世界中，尤其是在監獄裡，這是行不通的。監獄是艱難的地方。如果你遇到麻煩人，你必須為自己挺身而出。那是他們唯一懂的語言。”

當然，我不這麼認同。我說：“我不相信你。”他說：“你不住在監獄裡。”我回應道：“我們寺廟就是牢房，四周有牆。”其實，卡內特監獄沒有牆，但我們的寺廟有牆。....

不管怎樣，我挑戰了這個人，問：“在這監獄裡，誰是你必須面對麻煩的人？”我挑戰的囚犯和其他幾個囚犯在一起。他說：“主任。每天我的工作就是給他端茶和咖啡。這是我在監獄裡的工作。我討厭那個家伙。他總是很刻薄。”

他告訴我一個星期前發生的故事。卡內特的一名囚犯幾乎從未見過他的家人，因為那是一個難以到達的地方。那裡沒有公共交通，如果你很窮又沒有車，你就得找個朋友帶你一路過去。這是一個難以到達的地方。

他說這個人的妻子設法搭到車來看他，但在你可以去監獄裡見你的親戚之前，你必須登記，報上你的名字，通過所有安全檢查。

主任看到這位女士登記，知道她來看這名囚犯，於是決定殘酷地對待這位囚犯。

在公共廣播系統上，他說：’某某，我有個工作要你去卡內特監獄農場的另一邊‘，並把他發送到一個公共廣播系統聽不見的地方。這是一個巨大的監獄農場。他是故意這麼做的，因為當他的妻子登記進來時，公共廣播系統宣布：“囚犯某某，你的妻子在這裡，請到訪客區。”但他在被發送的地方聽不見這個消息。

這條消息重複了兩三次。人們試圖尋找他。找到了他時，到訪時間已經結束。他說：’下次再好運一點吧‘。他說：“主任故意這麼做，除了出於惡意，沒有其他原因，想讓囚犯們過得更艱難。這就是為什麼在那段時間他在監獄裡被稱為狗。”

我問：“你討厭他嗎？”

他說：“是的，真是非常討厭。他太難相處了。他從不尊重我們，從不和我們說話。他總是貶低我們，把我們當作垃圾。”

我說：“很好，這是一個挑戰。你每天都要給他端茶和咖啡。對他好。不要用手擁抱他，這樣會惹麻煩，但至少你可以用心去擁抱他。”

我說：“你可以這樣做，每次給他端茶和咖啡時，試著在茶或咖啡裡放一些愛和關懷。努力讓它成為你能做的最美味的咖啡。找出他喜歡什麼，對他好。每次給他端茶和咖啡時，注入很多慈悲。”

這位囚犯值得表揚，他嘗試了這個方法，持續了一週。當我一週後回來時問：“進展怎麼樣？”他說：“這完全是浪費時間。我努力對這個家夥好，但每次，即使我很用心地做了一杯好茶和咖啡，他完全忽視我，彷彿我不存在，彷彿我的地位比蟑螂還要低。他甚至對蟑螂說‘滾開’，卻不對我這樣。”

我告訴他：“繼續。”我不得不鼓勵他並強迫他這麼做，大約兩三個月後，才得到我所謂的重大突破。

有一天我去探望他，他迫不及待地告訴我。

他說，他為這位監獄官員做了一杯美味的咖啡，裡面加了奶油或他找到的其他東西，正是他認為監獄主任喜歡的類型，還設法找到了一些他注意到監獄官員喜歡的餅乾，他說：“這是給您的，先生，請喝這杯咖啡，我還找到了您喜歡的特別餅乾。”

而監獄官員只是“嗯。”他發出了一聲低沉的聲音。那就是我們的突破。[笑聲]

這是他第一次承認這名囚犯其實是活著的，存在的，呼吸的。那聲低吟，我說：“哇，這真令人興奮！”這是堤壩牆上的裂縫。

我沒錯。大約兩三周後，這名囚犯終於找到一杯特別的茶、一個三明治或其他什麼，遞給這位監獄官員，這位被稱為狗的主任，主任轉過身來說：“謝謝。”

所有其他囚犯都告訴我這件事，大家都看著我說：“你不知道監獄的八卦是怎麼運作的。這已經傳到了全州的每一個監獄。”這位主任能對一名囚犯說謝謝，真是不可思議。

我贏了這場挑戰。我知道我最終會贏。即使是這樣的狗，你也可以用巨大的善意把他變成一隻可愛的小狗。

你可以轉化麻煩人，但這需要大量的耐心和善意。有些人可能無法做到這一點，這對你來說可能太多了。你必須知道自己的界限。但如果你真的堅持下去，這是有效的。最困難的人可以成為你最好的朋友。有時這是一個值得面對的挑戰。在辦公室裡，對他們施以善意。

當他們回報你不善的態度和困難時，知道自己的限制。如果你必須逃避，那就走。如果需要，與他們談談，指出你的感受。今天下午在會議上講的內容也是我在這裡講的，老式的三明治技巧。

如果你確實需要告訴某人他對你造成了困難，我需要保護自己的空間，那麼你不要立刻就說出負面的東西。

這樣做是不會有效的。

每當你和某人交談，想提出一個困難的問題，也就是要批評他們，告訴他們他們給你帶來了麻煩，使用三明治技巧。

先給兩三句讚美。你是一個很棒的人，你非常勤奮，你的穿著很好，或者其他什麼，讚美他們，然後再告訴他們。

假設你想批評我。你可以說：“阿姜布拉姆，你真是一位好和尚，經常來這裡，給我們這些啟發性的講座。當你這樣說時，我會對你敞開心扉。你讓我輕鬆，我在聽你說。”然後你可以說：“但你的笑話有時會過火，但我知道你確實在關心寺廟和僧團。”最後再讚美。

如果你真的把批評夾在大量讚美之間，人們實際上會聽進去。如果你正在與一個麻煩人打交道，而你真的需要告訴他們，他們需要聽到你所說的，知道他們在做什麼以及造成的問題，請首先讚美他們。拉攏他們的心。這樣他們就知道自己不是在被攻擊。

這反映到你自己身上。當你因為自己是困難的人而被指責時，這不正是你需要的嗎？有時候我們會給別人造成困難。如果我要告訴你，我會這樣做。我會先讚美你，讓你知道我欣賞、重視和關心你。

如果你立刻就給出批評；如果我們是那個人，感覺會是——為什麼他們是我的敵人？為什麼他們只對我這麼說？難道他們不知道我工作有多辛苦，要面對的困難和問題有多少？當你立刻受到批評時，你只會變得具防備性，為自己辯護，而不會聽取對方的意見。你不會接受他們的話。

通過獲得接受，你被接受、被重視、被欣賞的事實意味著你在敞開心扉。然後你把批評放進去，再加上一些讚美。我真的很喜歡你，你真的很有價值，謝謝你做你自己。

那麼人們就能聽進去。很多時候，人們並不知道自己對你造成了困難。這很奇怪，但他們認為自己是在做朋友。他們認為自己在表現自己，或是搞笑，或是其他什麼。有時我們確實需要反饋來了解我們在做什麼以及我們的表現如何。

---阿姜布拉姆

《與麻煩人相處》《Dealing with difficult people》

《Dealing with difficult people》

So number one, you have to accept that, and you have to learn how to deal with them.

One is learn that they're part of life and you can learn so much from them.

Number two is to realize that most of the difficulty of difficult people is actually coming from you, the way we react to them.

Someone once said, "If ever you see a difficult person, remember, you only have to endure them for maybe a few minutes, a few hours at most." Even if you live withthem, it's your husband or your wife, I don't know why you chose that person anyway. That's your karma. [laughter] But anyway once you chose them....

Even if they're that close to you, you only have to live with them for a short period of time, but they have to live with themselves all day.

Sometimes when you think how irritating they are for you, they'll be equally irritating towards themselves. Those poor people have to live with that mind 24 hours a day.

It's a wonderful reflection when you see difficult people. You know if they're that difficult for you to live with, they're also difficult to live with themselves. That gives you so much compassion. It takes away the hurt which you feel, and you notice the hurt that they feel, that they're so difficult to you.

It's actually empathizing with the other person, taking the pain away from yourself.

Why do I have to deal with this person? Get an idea of what they are goingthrough in their head, in their mind, in their life. Some of these people, if they're that difficult to you and you're an ordinary person they've probably got no friends, no one they can really relate to, because they're such an incredibly difficult character to live with. They're so lonely.

That actually arouses a bit of compassion to such people. When you have compassion to such people, your endurance levels go up enormously. You can actually bear dealing with such people because you know they're not going to be around for long.

They're going to walk out of your office, or you're going to go home to somebody else.

If you can't escape from it, you can always come on a retreat in mymonastery or in Dhammasara monastery. There's always some place you can get away.That's one thing you can do . It's also to know that the difficult people in life, you can actually change them. It's a wonderful thing to know the difficulties which you face in life or difficulties which they experience, they are impermanent. They're not always there. It's a phase which people go through in their life, being difficult. Of course, that phase may last from birth

until death, but it ends eventually. [laughter]

It's not forever, but it's nice to know you can actually change people.You can actually see them grow. How you change people is a wonderful psychology which I've learned as a teacher, how you can interact with people and take the cause of them being difficult to themselves and others and actually just move that, nudge that, in a sense of learning to be more kind, more sensitive, less demanding, and less of a pain to live with.

It's wonderful. You can do that. How is that done? I was mentioning it in a talk this afternoon at Curtin University. I mentioned it a couple of weeks ago. This was a powerful little experience which I had about a month ago, maybe even longer, six weeks ago, in Singapore.

I was invited to give a talk at a conference at the Institute of Mental Health. It was one big anniversary of their hospital. They invited me over with all these other psychologists, psychiatrists, doctors and professors, as a monk, to give a talk on how to deal with mental health.

What I was talking about there was the things which you heard here before. What I was really impressed with was afterwards there was a devout Christian who was head of one of the

wards...departmental head. He invited me to his ward to do some Buddhist chanting. but he told me actually not to tell anybody. Now I've blown it. [laughter]

I said, "Why do you say that?" He said, "Because what you said just makes so much sense." He said, "I really respect that wisdom."

He said, "What I respect most of all is you're telling us something which you've only recently

been practicing. Where we don't focus on the times of the day where our patients are sick and difficult, the times when they experience delusions or psychosis,and are dysfunctional.

We just put that aside. The times that they are apparently healthy, where they're relating to themselves and their environment in a sensible way."

Because when a person has a mental dysfunction, it's not 24 hours a day.They have periods, times when they're sort of in some sort of delusional state and times when they come out afterwards.

He said, "They were focusing on the times when they weren't delusional,"and he said,

"By focusing on the times when they were healthy." He said, "A healing was happening." The times when they were healthy were extending and the times when they were dysfunctional were decreasing.

I'd been teaching that for years. It's wonderful to see that has gotten into a modern health system, in the only sort of mental hospital, which they have in that citystate.

I know that's the same with difficult people. If you focus on their difficulties and make a big deal about that, you're actually encouraging those difficulties. You're feeding them and eventually they'll get worse and worse and worse.

---Ajahn Brahm

28-11-2008 from:

《與麻煩人相處》

首先，你必須接受這一點，並學會如何與他們相處。

第一，認識到他們是生活的一部分，你可以從他們身上學到很多。

第二，意識到麻煩人的大部分問題其實來自於你自己，來自我們對他們的反應。

有人曾經說過：「如果你遇到困難的人，記住，你只需要忍耐他們幾分鐘，最多幾個小時。」即使你和他們住在一起，無論是你的丈夫還是妻子，我不知道你為什麼會選擇那個人。那是你的業力。[笑聲] 但無論如何，一旦你選擇了他們，即使他們與你如此親近，你也只需與他們相處短暫的時間，但他們必須整天與自己相處。有時候，當你覺得他們讓你很煩時，他們對自己也會同樣感到煩惱。那些可憐的人必須24小時與那種心境生活。

看到困難的人時，這是一個美妙的反思。你知道，如果他們對你而言如此困難，那麼他們對自己也是如此。這會讓你產生很多同情心。這會減輕你所感受到的痛苦，讓你注意到他們所感受到的痛苦，即他們對你而言是如此困難。

這實際上是在與他人共鳴，將痛苦從自己身上移開。

為什麼我必須與這個人打交道？我們可以了解他們心中正在經歷的事情，了解他們的生活。有些人，如果他們對你如此困難，而你又是普通人，他們可能沒有朋友，沒有人可以真正交流，因為他們是如此難以相處的角色。他們是如此孤獨。

這實際上會引起對這些人的一點同情。當你對這些人產生同情時，你的忍耐力會大大提高。你能夠承受與這些人相處，因為你知道他們不會長時間在你身邊。

他們會走出你的辦公室，或者你會回到其他人身邊。

如果你無法逃避，你總是可以來我寺廟或達馬薩拉寺院靜修。有總有地方可以逃避。這是一種你可以採取的方式。還有一點就是，生活中的麻煩人，其實你可以改變他們。知道你面對的困難或他們經歷的困難是無常的。它們並不會永遠存在。這是人們生活中經歷的階段，和一些人難以相處的階段。當然，這個階段可能會持續一生，但最終會結束。[笑聲]

這不是永恆的，但也很高興知道我們實際上可以改變人。你實際上可以看到他們的成長。如何改變人是一門很棒的心理學，作為老師我學到的，如何與人互動，並將他們對自己和他人造成困難的原因移開，並實際上讓他們學會變得更友善，更敏感，要求更少，與人相處時更少帶來麻煩。

這是美妙的。你可以做到這一點。這是如何做到的呢？我在今天下午的科廷大學演講中提到過。我幾週前提到過。這是我大約一個月前，甚至更久之前，在新加坡的一次強烈經歷。

我應邀在心理健康研究所的一個會議上發表演講。那是他們醫院的一個大型周年慶典。他們邀請我和其他心理學家、精神科醫生和教授一起，作為僧侶來發表如何處理心理健康的演講。

我在那裡談到的內容與你們之前聽到的內容相似。我真正印象深刻的是，之後有一位虔誠的基督徒，某個病房的負責人……部門主管。他邀請我去他的病房做一些佛教的誦經，但他告訴我實際上不要告訴任何人。現在我已經洩露了這個秘密。[笑聲]

我問：「你為什麼這麼說？」他說：「因為你所說的實在太有道理了。」他說：「我真的很尊重這種智慧。」

他提到：「我最尊重的是你告訴我們的東西，你最近才在實踐的。當我們不專注於患者生病和困難的時候；當他們經歷妄想或精神病，變得無法運作的時候，我們只是將這些放在一邊。當他們顯得健康的時候，他們又能與自己和環境能合理地聯繫。因為當一個人有心理功能障礙時，並不是24小時都如此。他們有時在某種妄想狀態中，然後又會回到正常狀態。」

他說：「他們專注於那些他們不是在妄想的時候」，他說：「通過專注於他們健康的時候。」他說：「療癒即可發生。」他們健康的時間在延長，而他們無法運作的時間在減少。

我教了這個好幾年。看到這種方法能夠進入現代醫療系統，這是該城市唯一的精神病院，真是太好了。

我知道這與困難的人也是一樣的。如果你專注於他們的困難，並對此大驚小怪，你實際上是在鼓勵這些困難。你在滋養它們，最終它們會變得越來越糟。

---阿姜布拉姆

《麻煩人是我們的老師》《Difficult people are our teachers》

《Difficult people are our teachers》

So first of all, there's nothing wrong with having difficult people. In fact, we can look upon difficult people...as my teacher Ajahn Chah says, they're a great blessing to our life.

They teach us patience. They teach us compassion. They actually lead to so much wisdom.

---Ajahn Brahm

28-11-2008 from:

《麻煩人是我們的老師》

首先，與麻煩人相處並沒有錯。事實上，我們可以把困難的人……正如我的老師阿姜查所說，他們是我們生命中的一大祝福。

他們教會我們耐心。他們教會我們慈悲。他們實際上帶來了許多智慧。

---阿姜布拉姆

28-11-2008 from:

https://bswa.org/teaching/bhikkhunis/

《Harmony between different sects of Buddhism》《不同佛教宗派的和諧》

《不同佛教宗派的和諧》

我曾經去過一些大乘寺廟，那裡有一些非常好的大乘僧侶，他們所做的和我一樣：他們遵守非常嚴格的戒律，禪修，教導佛法。

我想，這些人和我有什麼區別？他們的袍子顏色不同，但他們的修行都是佛教徒，都是僧侶。我意識到他們是比丘，我也是比丘，我們是兄弟。無論是大乘還是上座部，根本沒有任何區別。

看看這裡的首席尊者，你是在什麼部派（Nikaya）下受戒的？

是暹羅（Siam ）尼迦，還是什麼尼迦？這不重要，我是在泰國的摩訶尼迦受戒的。好吧，那是我的傳承。但這並不讓我和首席尊者分開，我們是兄弟，我們都是佛陀的兒子，這就是我們之所以是兄弟的原因。因此，我看不出任何區別，這些宗派和尼迦，對我來說，作為現代佛教徒，我們應該拋開這些。現在，看看，如果我們無法和諧共處，我們怎麼能教導別人和諧相處？

---阿姜·布拉姆

2011年5月9日，來源:

《Harmony between different sects of Buddhism》

I went to sort of Mahayana temples and there are some of those Mahayana monks that are really good monks and they were doing what I was doing: they were keeping a very strong Vinaya, they were practicing meditation, they were teaching the Dhamma. You know, I thought, what’s the difference between them and me? The color of their robes was different, but their practice, they were Buddhists, they were monastics. I realized they were bhikkhus and I was a bhikkhu, we were brothers. And a difference of Mahayana or Theravada made no difference at all.

Look at Chief Venerable here, what Nikaya will you ordained here was it Siam Nikaya, what Nikaya? Doesn’t matter, I was ordained in Maha Nikaya Thailand. Ok, that was my lineage as it was. But that doesn’t make me separate from the Chief, we’re brothers, we’re the same sons of the Buddha, that’s why we are brothers. So I can’t see any difference, all this sects, and Nikayas, I think that is something which as Buddhists in our modern world we should push aside. Now, look, if we can’t live in harmony together, how can we teach other people to live in harmony?

---Ajahn Brahm

9 May 2011 from:

https://bswa.org/teaching/bhikkhunis/

《explaining Nibanna using Wishing game 》《用願望遊戲解釋涅槃》

《用願望遊戲解釋涅槃》

有五個孩子在玩許願遊戲，規則是每個孩子都有一個願望，能提出最好願望的孩子會贏。

第一個孩子舉手說：「如果我有一個願望，我希望我有十個電腦遊戲……」

第二個孩子說：「如果我有一個願望，我希望擁有一家電玩商店。如果我擁有這家商店，我就可以隨時獲得新的電腦遊戲，這顯然是一個更好的願望……」

第三個孩子說：「如果我有一個願望，我希望我可以擁有一千億美元。擁有一千億美元後，我第一件要買的就是電腦遊戲商店。但是玩電腦遊戲的孩子們有個問題，他們的父母會告訴他們先做功課。所以在我買了自己的電腦遊戲商店之後，我會買自己的學校。如果我擁有這所學校，老師們總是要給我好成績，甚至校長也得對我好；否則我就不會給他們太多假期或工資。一旦我從自己的學校畢業，我將會買自己的大學；我不需要工作，可以隨時玩我的電腦遊戲，沒有任何問題。那一千億美元，還有我一生中想要的任何東西，我總是有足夠的錢來花。」這個一千億美元的願望，你能打敗嗎？

第四個孩子等了一會兒。每當別人問你問題時，永遠不要是第一個或第二個……

……第四個孩子是一個天才，她說：「如果我有一個願望，我希望有三個願望，我的第一個願望是擁有一家電腦遊戲商店，第二個願望是擁有一億美元；但我的第三個願望是擁有三個更多的願望，這樣我就可以永遠繼續下去。」這是一個真的很棘手的願望，無限的願望～

最後一個孩子輕鬆地贏得了願望遊戲。他說：「如果我有一個願望，我希望我能如此滿足，以至於我再也不需要任何願望。」

那就是佛陀。這就是涅槃的描述。如此滿足，以至於不需要願望。現在你知道什麼是涅槃了。

----阿姜·布拉姆

<1:14:05 :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkWMzhcimHs&t=5224s

《explaining Nibanna using Wishing game 》

There were these five children playing the wishing game , and the rules are like this every child has a wish and the one who comes up with the best wish would win .

So the first kid put the hand up and said,‘ if I had a wish, I wish I had ten computer games …..’

the second kid said, ‘if I had a wish I would wish for getting a shop. If I owned this shop, I could get a new computer game when I want it that's obviously a much better wish ….’

And the third kid said, ‘ If I had a wish, I wish I could have 100 billion dollars u.s.d. With 100 billion USD, the first thing I buy is e computer game shop【s】. But the problem with kids playing computer games is, their mothers and fathers will tell them to do their homework first.. So after buy my own computer game shops; I would buy my own school. if I own the school, the teachers always have to give me good marks, even the headmaster has to be nice to me ; otherwise I'll never give them many holidays or salaries. And once I graduate from my own school, I will buy my own University ; I don't have to do any work that I can play my computer games whenever I like without any problem. And that hundred million dollars u.s. there's anything else I ever want in my whole life I always have plenty of money to spend.’

The hundred billion USD wish, can you beat that?

And the fourth child waited for a while. Whenever people ask you questions, never be the first or the second…..

… The fourth kid was a genius, she said, ‘ if I had a wish, I wish for three wishes, my first place will have a computer game shops, second wish is to have $100,000,000 USD; but my third wish is to have three more wishes that way I can go on forever. That's a really tough wish, an infinity of wishes granted.

The last easily won the wishing game. He said, ‘ If I had a wish, I wish I were so content , that I never wish any wishes ever again.’

That’s Buddha. That’s describing nibanna. So content that you don’t need wishes. Now you know what nibanna is.

----Ajahn Brahm

<1:14:05 :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkWMzhcimHs&t=5224s

《Jhanas, Nirodha Samapatti, and enlightenment》《第四禪、滅盡定與覺悟》

《第四禪、滅盡定與覺悟》

一旦你進入第四禪，有時他們稱之為中捨；我更喜歡稱之為滿足，因為這種感覺非常愉快，並不乏味，但一旦靜止下來，某些東西就會消失！我記得有一句話：當你不觸碰電腦時，它會關閉，這是一個很好的比喻來說明心的運作。

在第四禪中，靜止得如此徹底，以至於沒有任何東西在運動；這就是正念和中捨的完美結合；如此靜止，以至於它開始關掉，而那些無色界禪那；就是心正在關閉的地方；對空間的感知，對識的感知都會關閉；而體驗就是「無」，你的心正在消失，然後經歷的是既無認知也無非認知——那到底是什麼？

當你從一個角度看，認知停止了；從另一個角度看，認知是你感知到它停止了；而之後就是認知和感受的完全停止；這就是識暫時的消失，這叫做滅盡（定）；滅盡是由靜止所創造的，當事物真正靜止時，所有東西皆止。

你在之後出來，因果法則，然後你又回到第四禪，然後再從禪中出來，隨著心智的浮現；但你出來時擁有如此強烈的正念；你帶著非常清晰的記憶；就像你知道你可以回到它們的形象；這叫做「回觀/省察智」，這就是你獲得這些美妙資料的方式，而這正是你可以覺悟的地方。

<1:13:34

《Jhanas, Nirodha Samapatti, and enlightenment》

Once you get into the fourth Jhana, that's you know, they sometimes call it equinity; I prefer to call it contentment because it's very pleasant it's not boring at all, but once it set still; then something disappears! I remember the saying, that when you don't tap anything on your computer; it turns off that's a good simile for how the mind works.

In the fourth Jhana, it's so still that nothing moving at all; that's Perfection of mindfulness and equinity; so still , so it starts to turn off and those immaterial attainments, the Arupas; that is where the mind is turning off; the perception of space , the perception of Consciousness turns off; and the experience is nothing; your mind is disappearing, and then the experience of neither perception or non-perception-- what the heck is that ?when you look at it one

Way, perception is stopped; looking at another way, perception is you perceive

it stopped; and after that is the full cessation of perception and feeling;that's where Consciousness ceases for a while it's nirodha; cessation, it's created by Stillness when things are really still ,things stop. Everything.

And then you come out afterwards, Karma, and then you go backwards back into the fourth Jhanas, and back out the Jhanas, as the Mind emerges ; but you come out with such a strong mindfulness; you come out with a very clear memory of them; it's like you know you can go back into the image of them; it's called paccavekkhana nana; that's how you have this wonderful data and that's where you can get enlightened.

<1:13:34

《Were we Buddhas in our past lives?》《我們過去世曾是佛陀嗎？》

《我們過去世曾是佛陀嗎？》

你不可能前世是佛陀

因為一旦你成佛，死後你就會消失！

那是你最後的一生，沒有其他。

<1:04:34

《Were we Buddhas in our past lives?》

you couldn't have been a Buddha before, because once you're a Buddha, after you pass away you disappear! it's your last life, nothing else

<1:04:34

《An infant that talks!》《會說話的嬰兒！》

《會說話的嬰兒！》

信徒：如果這一生無法達到涅槃該怎麼辦？

阿姜·布拉姆：那就再投生。

長大後再去上學。

再被父母訓斥。

再去找工作。

再變老。

再結婚。

你要做多少次這些事？！

你知道有時候--你可能不相信這些---但有一些有趣的現象。是我信任的人告訴我的。有很多人經歷過他們的孩子在生命的第一天就會說話。

這發生在加州；一個嬰兒出生了；從母親的子宮裡出來；醫生和助產士都看到並聽到了。這個孩子從母親的子宮裡出來，環顧四周，說了句話：「哦，不要再來！」

你明白他為什麼這麼說嗎？當你活夠時，你就會明白。

<1:24:26

《An infant that talks!》

Devotee: What to do if I cannot attain nibanna this life?

Ajahn Brahm: go and get reborn again.

Grow up and go to school again

Get told off by your parents again

Go find a job again

Get old again

Get married again

How many times you have to do this?!

You know sometimes , you may not believe in this, there are some sort of interesting phenomena. People I trust told me this. There are many people who experienced that their children; their first day of their lives talking.

And this was happened in California; a baby was born ; came out of the wound; the doctors and midwives ; they saw it and they heard it. The kid came out of the mother’s womb, the baby looked around and said the words, ‘ Oh no~ not again~ ‘

Do you understand why he said that? You will understand when you have had enough to live.

<1:24:26

《What next when you get deep meditation》《進入深度禪定後該怎麼辦》

《進入深度禪定後該怎麼辦》

當你進入深度禪定時，有些人接近這種狀態。

然後他們會問：「下一步我該怎麼做？」

三個錯誤：

「我」

「做」

和「下一步」

沒有「我」，放下它。不要在打坐時緊抓著方向盤。

「做」？你不會去「做」打坐。

放下！讓它去吧！

「下一步」？沒有下一步，現在沒有‘去’。不要「做」下一步。

這意味著，你會變得非常平靜，但這對人們來說會很可怕；你知道那很可怕；因為你必須放下所有；你消失了，你不見了。

你消失了，寶貝，你真的消失了（呵呵）。

但你是完全清醒的，在內心深處。

這讓你洞察涅槃是什麼--事物的消失。

<1:01:20

《What next when you get deep meditation》

When you get into some deep meditation, some of you get close.

And they say, ‘what do I do next?’

Three mistakes

‘I’

‘do’

And ‘next’

No ‘I’, let go . Don’t hang onto the driver wheel in meditation

Do it? You are not going to meditate.

Let Go! Let it be!

Next? There is no next , no go now. Don’t ‘do’ ‘next ’

That means, you get very peaceful , but it does get very scary for people; you know why it’s scary; because you have to let go everything; you vanish, you gone.

You gone, baby, you are gone (hehehe)

But you are perfectly awakened aware, deeper inside

Now this give you an insight what nibanna is. Things disappear and vanish

<1:01:20

覺悟存在，但沒有覺悟的人Enlightenment is , But not the person who enters it

覺悟存在，但沒有覺悟的人

‘道’存在，但在這上沒有行走者

Woah, 我一直都愛這句句子

道存在，但沒有人造這條道路

你見不到行走者

這就準確地是你在禪修所做的東西，你～消失～

----Ajahn Brahm

Enlightenment is , But not the person who enters it

The Path is , but no travellers on it you see

Woah, I always love that phrase:

The path is, but no one does the path, who walks the path

no travellers on it you see

And that is precisely what you do when you are meditating—you vanish, you disappear!

----Ajahn Brahm

<55:04

《Luang Por Ganha and the King Cobra 》《隆波甘哈與眼鏡蛇的故事》

《隆波甘哈與眼鏡蛇的故事》

如果你不認識阿姜甘哈，我得告訴你一個關於阿姜甘哈和一條蛇的故事，那是一條眼鏡蛇。wooo~

他在叢林中打坐。僧侶們正坐下來打坐。他聽到叢林動物靠近的聲音，睜開眼睛，看到的動物是一條蛇！一條大蛇！一條眼鏡蛇！

在泰國的那個地方，人們通常稱眼鏡蛇為“一步蛇”。為什麼呢？因為如果眼鏡蛇咬了你，你只能走一步，然後就會死去。wooo~

…所以眼鏡蛇滑了過來，阿姜甘哈舉起手，眼鏡蛇張開了它的蛇冠，ZZZZ~（哈哈哈）就在阿姜甘哈的鼻子前面！ZZZ~

那麼，如果你是阿姜甘哈，你會怎麼做？面對這條非常危險的蛇ZZZ~就在你鼻子前面。

別想著逃跑，因為這些蛇比保特還快。我見過它們！它們滑行得非常快！我不可能贏過它們。阿姜甘哈也不可能，那麼阿姜甘哈做了什麼？

他舉起手，輕輕拍了拍眼鏡蛇的頭，並用泰語說：“謝謝你來探望我。”

這是一個真實的故事。其他僧侶都看到了；他拍了拍眼鏡蛇的頭！你能做到嗎？不！這就是為什麼眼鏡蛇享受被一位高僧拍頭的每一分鐘。作為一條眼鏡蛇，能夠享受到這樣的拍打可不多見，所以它享受著每一分鐘，哦，是的；就那樣（阿姜布拉姆在拍他的頭）。

在拍了5-10分鐘後，眼鏡蛇覺得被高僧拍頭的時間夠了；它收起蛇冠，低下頭，然後朝另一位僧侶爬去。“不不不，回去！”（哈哈哈）

但那是阿姜甘哈，多年前他曾在我位於珀斯的寺院待過一段時間。

《Luang Por Ganha and the King Cobra 》

If you don’t know Ajahn Ganha, I have to Tell you a story about Ajahn Ganha and a snake, it was a King Cobra. Woo~

He was meditating in the jungle. The monks were sitting down and meditating. He heard the sound of a jungle animal coming close. They opened their eyes and the animal they saw, coming close to them, was a snake! A big snake! A King Cobra！

And in that part of Thailand , they used to call King Cobras as the one-step-snake. Why? Because if the King Cobra bites you, you have one step , and you will be dead. Woo~

…So the King Cobra slid up, Ajahn Ganha raised his hand, (the king cobra) opened his hood , ZZZZ~(hahahaha) right in front of Ajahn Ganha nose! ZZZ~

Now, what would you do if you were Ajahn Ganha? And you have this big one step snake, dangerous snake ZZZ~ right in front of your nose.

Don’t think of running, because these snakes are faster than Usain Bolt. I’ve seen them! They slither so fast! I could not have won them. Ajahn Ganha could not have won them; so what did Ajahn Ganha do?

He raise his hand, and patted the King Cobra on the head, saying in Thai, ‘Thankyou for coming to visit me’

Now it’s a true story. All the other monks saw that; and he patted the Cobra on the head! Could you do that? No! that is the reason of why the cobra loved every minute of patting from a senior monk. Not often can you get a patting if you are a king cobra, so its enjoying every minute, oh yeah; just over there (Ajahn Brahm patting his head)

And after 5-10 minutes, the king cobra has patted enough by the head monk; he closed his hood, put his head down, and he crawl towards one of the other monks. ‘nonono, go back’ But that was Ajahn Ganha, who came to stay some time in my monastery in Perth many years ago

from <26:11