厭離世間 Detaching from the world

聽過有三十歲的男人，

從出生到現在，都一直臥在病床上

從沒離開過醫院

如果我們繼續無止境地輪迴，

終有一天會成為他

It is heard that  there is a thirty-year-old man ,

who has been lying on the hospital bed since birth,

and has never left the hospital.

If we continue to cycle endlessly through samsara, 

one day we will become like him.

一個真正的修行人，是依循八聖道而行的人

他們有一個特質，就是不會再把重心放到世間的事物上了

重心會放到法上

Ajahn Golf 曾說：‘一位初果聖者，他在世間退了出來，他嚮往這個法的方向去發展。

對於那些普通人，大多數的人，他們就會用身口意和能力在這個世間法上發展。一位真正的佛教徒，他在世間上退了出來，不再投放更多的本錢在這個世間上。因為他們看到，這個世間不能帶走任何東西。就是因為這樣的理由，一位智者會懂得利用所擁有的本錢去投放在法上發展。‘

如果我們想成為初果聖者，要往這方面發展

不然就是往痛苦的方向去發展...

A true Dhamma practitioner is one who follows the Noble Eightfold Path. 

They have a quality of not placing their focus on worldly matters anymore; instead, their focus is on the Dhamma.

Ajahn Golf once said: "A Stream-Enterer has withdrawn from the world and aspires to develop in the direction of the Dhamma. For most ordinary people, they will develop using their body, speech, and mind in worldly affairs. 

A true Buddhist has withdrawn from the world and no longer invests more resources in it, because they see that this world cannot take anything with them. 

For this reason, a wise person understands how to use their resources to invest in the development of the Dhamma."

If we want to become a Stream-Enterer, we should develop in this direction;

 otherwise, we are moving towards suffering...

有時一些人總喜歡向Luang Por Ganha 投訴自己的兒女。

Luang Por 有時會感到不知所措，然後反問：‘如果你沒有結婚，又何來有孩子去給你投訴呢？’

同樣地，如果我們沒有身體，就不會有身體所帶來的痛苦

如果沒有感受，就不會有感受所帶來的痛苦

如果沒有記憶，就不會有記憶所帶來的痛苦

如果沒有思想，就不會有思想所帶來的痛苦

哪裡沒有這些和一切麻煩？ 涅槃。

涅槃只有平靜和快樂，沒有痛苦

Sometimes, some people like to complain to Luang Por Ganha about their children.
Luang Por sometimes feels overwhelmed and then responds, "If you hadn’t married, would you have children to complain about?"

Similarly, if we have no body, we wouldn't experience the suffering that comes with having a body.
If there are no feelings, there wouldn't be suffering from feelings.
If there are no memories, there wouldn't be suffering from memories.
If there are no thoughts, there wouldn't be suffering from thoughts.

Where can we find a place without these and all troubles? nibanna.

Nibanna is only filled with peace and happiness, without suffering.

有時一些人會挑釁：‘你想打敗我？下輩子啦！’

那表示什麼？ 那等於說下輩子自己就會被打敗😂

如果誰能夠斷除一切煩惱，把無明完全鏟起。

那麼他連下輩子被打敗的機會也沒有

因為沒有下一世😂

這些人便真的立於不敗之地了

Sometimes some people provoke: "You want to defeat me?Next life!"

What does that mean? It essentially means that in the next life, they will be defeated. 😂

If someone can completely eradicate all defilements and uproot ignorance, then they won't even have the chance to be defeated in the next life, because there is no next life. 😂

These individuals are truly in an invincible position.

有時我們看到一些政府官員，在十幾年前是這樣說的，現在說的竟然完全相反了

有些人會笑他們精神分裂

但其實我們都一樣

想想從出生以來，我們改變了多少次的主意、 觀點、 看法？

噢～這個現象實在令人懼怕

不僅是我們的認知在改變；我們的身體也在改變，我們的感受也在改變，我們的意志也在改變，我們的覺知也在改變

根本就沒有實體，抓不住

這是痛苦的一種顯現...

Sometimes we see government officials who said one thing over a decade ago, and now they are saying the exact opposite.

Some people might laugh and call them schizophrenic,
but in reality, we are the same.

Think about how many times we have changed our minds, views, and opinions since we were born.

Oh, this phenomenon is truly frightening.

Not only is our perceptions changing; our bodies are changing, our feelings are changing, our will is changing, and our consciousness is changing.

There is fundamentally no solid self to hold onto.
This is a manifestation of suffering...

有一個故事是這樣的。

曾經有一個小女孩，她非常喜歡吃榴蓮的

她的父母為了滿足她，就天天都給她吃榴蓮。每當她想吃時，父母就給她吃

過了好像一個月多些，她一見到榴蓮已經要作嘔了

過了幾十年後，她仍然對榴蓮有恐懼.....

慾望是很狡猾的，不斷指揮我們要這樣要那樣

我們以為得到了後會快樂？

結了婚的人，想想我們談了多少次戀愛吧。

每次我們都把那位女孩子或男孩子當作是宇宙中最重要的人

當把他/她追到手後

日對夜對，終究分手收場了。場場戀愛也是這樣

到現在結婚了，有小孩了；真的如先前想像般幸福嗎？

別傻了，世間就是這樣

我們得到了這樣夢寐以求的東西後，過了一會兒又厭倦，想要其他東西了

得到了那樣東西後，又厭倦了；又想要其他東西了

唯一讓人永不厭倦的快樂，是禪定所帶來的快樂，涅槃所帶來的快樂

Luang ta siri 形容涅槃為永恆的快樂

There is a story like this:

There was once a little girl who loved to eat durian. 

To satisfy her, her parents gave her durian every day. 

Whenever she wanted it, they would provide it. 

After about a month, just the sight of durian made her nauseous. 

Even decades later, she still had a fear for durian.

Desire is very cunning, constantly urging us to want this and that. 

We think that once we obtain what we desire, we will be happy.

For those who are married, think about how many times we've been in love. 

Each time, we treated that boy or girl as the most important person in the universe. 

Yet, after winning their affection, day after day, we eventually broke up. 

All our relationships ended this way. 

Now that we are married with children, are we truly as happy as we once imagined?

Don’t be foolish; this is how the world works. 

After obtaining something we long for, we quickly grow bored and want something else.

Once we get that new thing, we become tired of it too, and seek yet another desired objects.

The only joy that never grows tiresome is the happiness that comes from stillness and the bliss of nibanna. 

Luang Ta Siri describes nibanna as highest eternal happiness.

Generally speaking, marriage is simply a matter of mutual needs. 😂

Women usually seek money, while men typically desire young bodies for sex.

Once a man has no money, the marriage falls apart.

Once a woman is no longer sexy or beautiful, the marriage also crumbles.

Oh, the conditioned phenomena are truly frightening.

Do we still yearn for love?

If we are in a romantic relationship, it's best to elevate selfish love to selfless love:

loving kindness- Wishing for the other’s happiness.

compassion- Wishing for the other to be free from suffering.

Joy - Being happy for the other’s achievements and joy.

Equanimity - Not being affected by whether the other is good or bad to oneself. If the other leaves, not feeling emotional. Even if we want to help them but can't, we won't be sad. Maintaining inner peace and letting go.

This way, the relationship will be more stable and long-lasting...

一般的婚姻根本就是個取所需😂

女人通常要錢，男人通常要年輕的肉體去性交

一旦男人沒錢，婚姻就破裂

一旦女人不再性感美麗，婚姻就破裂

噢～條件組合的東西真是可怕。大家還嚮往愛情嗎？

如果我們在談戀愛，最好把自私的愛情昇華為無私的愛：

1.慈-希望對方快樂

2.悲-希望對方離苦

3.喜-為對方的成就和快樂感到高興

4.捨-對方對自己是好是壞，都不起情緒。對方離開自己，也不起情緒。就算我們想幫對方，但幫不到，也不會難過。內心保持平靜中捨

那麼這段關係就會比較穩定和長久.... 

看過一位女生，一直以來都是女同性戀者，比較男性化

但後來和她的女友分手後

她就變得女性化

之後竟然和男生談戀愛起來了。

也聽過一位男生原本喜歡女生，和女生談戀愛

但後來分手後，竟然喜歡上男生

同樣地，生死輪迴是無限地漫長的，佛陀說它沒有起點（SN15.6)

現在是男生的我們，過去也曾是女生，也曾經愛上男生

現在是女生的我們，過去也曾是男生，也曾經愛上女生

單單只是這樣，就足以對一切條件組合的事物厭離、離貪與解脫了！

There was once a girl who had always been a lesbian and was masculine. 

But after breaking up with her girlfriend, she became more feminine and eventually started dating a guy.

It is also heard that a guy who originally liked girls and dated them; but after breaking up, he ended up liking guys.

Similarly, samsara is infinitely long. The Buddha said it has no beginning (SN 15.6). 

As males now, we have also been females in the past and have loved men. 

As females now, we have also been males in the past and have loved women.

Just this understanding alone is enough to cultivate detachment from all conditioned things, to let go of craving, and to attain liberation!

其實輪迴根本就是一個騙局

我們以為擁有很多東西的人就是勝利者

於是我們也渴求擁有很多東西

但我們看不清，真正的勝利者是什麼都沒有的

是指心中什麼都沒有～

假如我們心中擁有許多東西，反而是人生的失敗者

為什麼這樣說？ 

看過一段惡搞影片，就是兒子想惡整父親

於是帶來了一個演員來扮自己的女友，但人設是一個夜總會女郎😂

父親看到後當然心裡很不是滋味，但仍然抑制自己的情緒；說，其實最重要還是他們覺得合拍就行，自己不會干預他們

誒～如果我們這樣聽到，都會讚那位父親真是開明、 好相處，對嗎？

為什麼如此做到？ 那是因為父親並沒有把兒子太當成是‘我的’ 

他心中並沒有太執住兒子，有兒子好像沒兒子那樣

這樣反而能夠和兒子維持良好的關係

有許多情侶，之所以能夠細水長流，相伴到老

也是因為他們有伴侶好像沒伴侶，沒有太把伴侶當成是‘我的’

如此減少了許多的控制欲、 壓迫感、 妒忌、 吝嗇、 生氣、 傷心等等的負面情緒

這樣反而能夠一直維持良好的關係

有些有錢人富有時不太快樂，有些卻能很快樂

那是因為有部分有錢人把財富當成是‘我的’、‘我的’ ，非常吝嗇，既不肯把錢用在自己身上，也不肯把錢用到別人身上。結果沒有絲毫快樂

但有些有錢人卻沒有太把財富當成是‘我的’ ，慷慨大方，能夠把錢用在自他身上，為自他帶來快樂

把有當成是沒有，反而是最成功的人

所以輪迴根本就是騙局

沒有的人想要擁有

擁有而過得快樂的人，卻沒有真的擁有

我們還追求些什麼？

當下‘沒有’ 已經是最快樂的了，不要再投胎轉世了

In fact, samsara is essentially a scam.
We think that those who possess many things are the winners.
Thus, we also crave to have many possessions.
But we fail to see that the true winners are those who have nothing—
meaning, those who have nothing in their hearts.

If our hearts are filled with many things, we are actually the failures in life.
Why do we say this?
once  there is a  prank video where a son wanted to prank his father.
He brought in an actor to play his girlfriend, but the character was that of a nightclub hostess. 😂
When the father saw this, he naturally felt uncomfortable, but he suppressed his emotions and said that what mattered most was that they felt compatible, and he wouldn’t interfere.

If we heard this, we would praise that father for being open-minded and easy to get along with, right?
Why was he able to do this? Because the father didn’t see his son as “mine.”
He didn’t hold on too tightly to the idea of having a son, as if having a son was like not having one at all.
This allowed him to maintain a good relationship with his son.

Many couples can continue happily together until old age
because they treat their partner as if they don’t really possess them, not holding on tightly to the idea of “mine.”
This reduces the many negative emotions such as desire to control, stress, jealousy, stinginess, anger, and sadness.
This, in turn, allows them to maintain a good relationship.

Some wealthy people are not very happy, while others are quite happy.
This is because some wealthy individuals view their wealth as “mine” and are very stingy, unwilling to spend money on themselves or others. As a result, they find no happiness at all.
But some wealthy individuals don’t see their wealth as “mine”; they are generous and can use their money for themselves and others, bringing happiness to both.
Those who treat having as not having are the most successful.

Thus, samsara is essentially a scam.
Those who have nothing want to possess.
Those who posess but are happy, however, do not truly possess.
Why are we still pursuing?
In the present moment, "not having" is already the happiest; there’s no need to be reborn again.

我們看到，兒女的誕生也是無我的、無法掌控的

如果能夠掌控，這對江蘇父母第一胎就已經誕下男生了

事實上這世上並沒有什麼我們可以指揮和控制的

無法掌控的特質是不如意和苦的

因此應對此現象厭離

image cred. to 香港01

If we are over fifty, we are likely to resonate with the following phenomenon:

The friends we've known since elementary or middle school, some of whom have had rich romantic lives and have dated many times.

We remember how they seemed to win the world when they first fell in love, boasting to everyone. But soon after, they would argue and sadly break up.

The second time, it was the same.

The third time, again the same.

With each new relationship, their excitement fades, and the feelings during breakups also become more plain.

Some have gone through dozens of relationships; some marry and then divorce, only to marry again and divorce again.

We feel fear and weariness in response to such phenomena

because everything that arises will eventually cease.

Luang Por Pramote said that when one realize the fruit of stream-entry, they see this truth.

如果我們年過半百，相信會對以下現象很有感受：

我們身邊由小學或中學開始認識的朋友

有些感情生活豐富，談過許多次戀愛

我們見他們第一次談戀愛的時候就好像贏了全世界那樣，向全世界炫耀；之後過了不久就吵架，然後傷心分手

第二次又是這樣

第三次又是這樣

每次追求到女孩子時心情就越來越平淡，分手時心情也越來越平淡

有些談戀愛十幾次

有些結婚後離婚，

再結婚，再離婚

應對這樣的現象感到懼怕和厭倦

因為凡生起的都會滅去

隆波帕默說證悟初果時就是看到這一點 

Usually, the boss is confrontational, sarcastic, arrogant, and rude. When we have enough money, we then proudly submit our resignation letter : I'm done!

Similarly, this world is confrontational, sarcastic, arrogant, and rude toward us. When our precepts, stillness, and wisdom are perfected, we can attain nibanna and then proudly submit our resignation to this world: I'm out!

平時老闆針鋒相對、尖酸刻薄、傲慢無禮

當錢夠了；就士氣高昂地遞辭職信：我不做了！

同樣地，這個世界對我們針鋒相對、尖酸刻薄、傲慢無禮

當我們的戒、定、慧圓滿了的時候；我們就能證悟涅槃，然後士氣高昂地向這個世界遞辭職信：我不玩了!

We were originally still immersed in the joy of Sunday,

but in the blink of an eye, it's already Wednesday night.

Time keeps flowing,

and the last moment has completely vanished.

This reality is fearsome and leads to detachment from the world.

原本我們還沉醉於星期天的快樂之中，

但眨一下眼現在已經星期三晚上了

時間一直在流動

上一刻已經完全滅掉了

這個事實讓人怖畏且厭離世間

老、病、死是每個人都一定要經歷的

無論是佛陀還是什麼宗教的領袖，

都逃不過老病死的命運

因此應當厭離無常、無法掌控、不斷受壓迫的生命

Old age, sickness, and death are experiences that everyone must go through.

Whether it is the Buddha or any religious leader, no one can escape the fate of aging, illness, and death.

Therefore, one should  detach from life with natural of  impermanence, uncontrollability, and constant oppression

在香港，人們會形容那些談戀愛許多許多次的人做 A380

例如聽過有些談戀愛了許多次的年輕女孩子，一見到又有男孩子來追求，就翻白眼：‘你們這些男人,又想和我性交吖嘛’

然後談戀愛了也不當一回事,因為已經談了許多次了,摸清套路了(笑)

甚至男朋友隨時離開分手都沒有所謂

為什麼?因為慣了!對愛情厭倦了!

同樣地,我們也是輪迴中的A380

如果我們真的能夠記起無盡的過去世, 一見到美好的人事物來了,就翻白眼: '你們又想匆匆走來然後又匆匆離去, 讓我傷心難過吖嘛!'

就算擁有美好的事物也不當一回事,因為已經經歷過許多次,摸清套路了

甚至它們隨時離開都沒有所謂

為什麼?因為慣了! 對輪迴和世間厭倦了!

In Hong Kong, people describe those who have been in many romantic relationships as A380

For example, have know that some  young girls who have dated many times might roll their eyes when another guy pursues them, saying, "You men, do you just want to sleep with me again?"

Then, they don't take the relationship seriously because they've been through it so many times and know the routine (laugh).

Even if a boyfriend leaves or they break up, it doesn't matter.

Why? Because they are used to it! They are tired of love!

Similarly, we are like A380 in the cycle of samsara.

If we could truly remember our endless past lives, when we see beautiful people or things, we would roll our eyes and say, "You just want to rush in and then rush out, leaving me sad!"

Even if we possess beautiful things, we don't take them seriously because we've experienced it many times and know the routine.

They can leave at any time, and it doesn't matter.

Why? Because we are used to it! We are tired of the samsara and the world!

哈佛大學醫學院和澳洲昆士蘭大學的研究員，設計了一個很大型有關精神健康的研究。

研究結果顯示這個世界近一半人在這一生中都會患上情緒病或精神病。

聽過有精神科教授教導醫學生，就是不要以為我們不會變得好像面前的精神科病人那樣。

試想像，假如未來你畢業後，要考專業試。

然後你的女朋友/老婆說他懷孕了

你的媽媽剛被騙徒騙走了所有的財產，還欠下巨債。要你分擔償還

你發現自己患上泌尿科的頑疾

他說:你們那時才說自己會沒有壓力！

一切現象都是條件組合的。任何人只要過去有某個業，都有可能遭遇眼前可憐人的困境

佛陀說，因為輪迴是無開始的，長得不可思議。所以我們幾乎可以肯定，我們過去也曾經遭受過如他這般的苦。單是這樣，已經足以讓我們厭倦條件組合的事物了！（SN15.11-12）

《投胎轉世不是那麼好玩》

有一次，佛陀說,就如少量的屎尿等會有惡臭,少至一彈指的存在他也不讚賞 （AN1.320-321）.

再生對於佛陀來說，就如屎便一樣痛苦。

因為一旦存在，就等於給予各種痛苦機會，去擊打我們。

假如我們有宿命通，然後回顧自己的過去世，就會發現投胎真的很苦。

做人做得不好可以下地獄幾十，幾千，幾萬，幾百萬年。

從地獄出來還要投胎做畜生，餓鬼許多世，才可以做回人。

今生做得好，不等於過去生生世世也做得好，也不等於未來世也會做得好。

就算給我們做到天帝，又如何呢？帝釋天工作那麼繁忙，又要管理人間的事務，又要管理天界的事務。任何人持五戒持得乾淨，都有機會上天界。但我們觀察自己的心，就會發現貪嗔癡一大摞。除了阿羅漢--完全去掉我慢的人之外，人人都是自私的。Por khao wanchart yimme 也這樣認可。於是上到天界一樣會有很多是非，鬥爭，妒忌。天帝光是處理這些都已經煩死了。有時帝釋天會抱怨，那些天子看起來比自己還要幸福呢。他們在渡假，自己卻要工作。

只要有存在，就有苦。

梵天界也沒有我們想像中那麼好。色界梵天神的身心始終是處於轉變之中，無色界的梵天神也不是永恆的，那個不穩定確實讓人厭倦。曾經舍利佛尊者幫一位在家人臨終關懷，引導他的心傾向於梵天。那位在家人死後便投生到梵天去了。佛陀知道之後便質問舍利佛，意思是為什麼不引導他證涅槃呢？ （MN97）。 就算是比較快樂的梵天投生，佛陀也不讚美

生了又死，死了又生，生了又死。

這個現象讓人太過厭倦了。

放下這個身，放下這個心，當下便得自由。

"The Mouse"

This mouse runs on a road filled with cheese. After eating one piece of cheese, it is not satisfied and runs ahead to eat another. After finishing that, it still feels unsatisfied and chases after more cheese. Forever unsatisfied, forever unfulfilled, it goes on endlessly.

We are like this mouse.

When we are young, we want to grow up, thinking that growing up will bring happiness.

Once we grow up, we desire wealth, fame, status, and power, believing that having these will make us happy.

But after acquiring them, we still feel discontent and want more.

We see someone like Donald Trump and think he is admirable; thus, we aspire to become the President of the United States.

After dying and being reborn in the U.S., we indeed become President, yet we still feel unsatisfied, thinking that being the President of Russia would be better…

Forever unsatisfied, forever unfulfilled, it goes on endlessly.

Until one lifetime, he meets a wise person who tells him: "Hey, why are you being so foolish? All these things are constantly changing, uncontrollable, and unsustainable; they are filled with risks and side effects. Becoming something will always come with some pain; clinging to them will only bring suffering."

Then he awakens, lets go of worldly attachments, and realizes Nibanna, no longer reborn. 

《老鼠》

這隻老鼠跑在一條充滿著芝士的道路

吃完這塊芝士後，不滿意，再跑向前吃

吃完後又不滿意，再跑向前追其他芝士

永不滿意，永不滿足，沒完沒了

我們就是這隻老鼠

小時候想要長大，覺得長大後會快樂

長大後又想要許多財富，名譽，地位，權力，覺得擁有後會快樂

但擁有後又不滿意，想要更多

看見Donald trump, 又覺得Donald Trump 很好；於是發願要成為美國總統

死後再生到美國，真的成為了美國總統；然後又不滿意，覺得成為俄羅斯總統比較好.....

永不滿意，永不滿足，沒完沒了

直到有一世，他遇見了有智慧的人

跟他說：誒，為什麼那麼傻呢？這些全部都是不斷變異、無法掌控、維持不了的事物；充滿著過患與副作用，成為什麼一定會伴隨著某些痛苦；執著它們只會帶來痛苦

然後他頓悟，放下世間；證入涅槃，不再投胎

有些人會覺得特朗普很威威

心理面就嚮往也成為特朗普

其實有什麼好? 成為什麼,就有什麼的苦

特朗普也有特朗普的苦,不是嗎?

當一個人有貪嗔癡,就肯定有苦, 有內心的壓力,燥熱和不安.

我們看到有修行的佛教徒已經是這樣了,更何況非佛教徒?

其實我們都成為過特朗普了.

佛陀說, 這個輪迴是沒有開始的,被無明蓋住、渴愛所束縛的眾生,他們的流轉、輪迴; 那個的起點是不被知道的.

當我們看見一個人很幸福,佛陀說,我們已經可以下結論:我們經過那麼長時間,都已經這樣經歷過了（SN15.12）

還有什麼好追求? 這已經足以讓我們在一切條件組合的事物上厭離、離染、解脫了

Some people may feel that Donald Trump is very impressive, and secretely in mind, they aspire to become like him.

But what’s so good about it? Whatever you become comes with its own suffering.

Trump has his own struggles, doesn’t he?

Whenever a person has greed, hatred, and delusion, they will definitely experience suffering, inner pressure, restlessness, and unease.

We see that even Buddhists practitioners experience this; how much more so for non-Buddhists?

In fact, we have all been like Trump before.

The Buddha said that this cycle of rebirth has no beginning; beings are obscured by ignorance and bound by craving, their wandering and reincarnation starting point is unknown

When we see someone being very blessed, the Buddha said we can conclude: For this long period of time, we have experienced that already(SN 15.12).

So what else is worth pursuing?

This is enough for us to grow weary of all conditioned things, to detach, and to attain liberation!

我們放不下，是因為看不清。

因為看不清，所以我們覺得它們是好的，把它們緊緊抓住。

名譽很好？名譽是苦。因為他來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了。

權力很好？權力是苦。因為他來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了。

地位很好？地位是苦。因為他來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了。

財富很好？財富是苦。因為他來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了

美貌很好？美貌是苦。因為他來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了

我們的伴侶很好？伴侶是苦。因為他來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了。

家人朋友很好？家人朋友是苦。因為他們來了，停留一會兒，就自己離去了。

這個身體很好？這個身體是苦。因為它來了，停留一會兒，就壞滅了。

這個心很好？這個心是苦。因為它生起，立即就滅了。

我們放不下，是因為看不清。

一看清楚，就能勇敢地自願放下

當我們看見小孩子在街大吵大鬧

父母叫也叫不聽

就知道他並不真的屬於他父母的

因為連父母也控制不到他的思想，說話和行為

他並不屬於任何人

假如我們生了孩子

我們會覺得他是我們的嗎？

When we see a child making a scene on the street, and the parents are calling out but the child doesn’t listen, we know that the child does not truly belong to the parents. This is because even the parents cannot control the child's thoughts, speech, or behavior. 

The child does not belong to anyone.

If we have a child, would we feel that they are ours?

This is a post from a public account on Threads, sharing some insights. Since it’s public, I’m sharing it here. Below is the english version:

"As I grow older, I realize:

When sharing happy moments with others, they may think you’re showing off.

When sharing unhappy moments, they may think you’re spreading negative energy.

When sharing your failures, they may think you’re foolish.

When sharing your successes, they may think you’re arrogant.

In the end, I  discover that no one really wants to know or care.

Everyone just likes to talk about themselves.

People prefer to communicate with those who share similar experiences and thoughts.

It’s all about a sense of resonance."

Let’s break down this text.

"When sharing happy moments, others may think you’re showing off.

When sharing unhappy moments, others may think you’re spreading negative energy."

Well, there’s some truth to that. When you tell others about your achievements and good things, for most people, 99% of the time, it’s driven by ego, thinking they are better than others, which indeed comes off as showing off (laugh).

However, our friends and family see us as "theirs," so they feel happy for us. Those who are genuinely happy for us are virtuous people.

For everyone else, sharing our achievements will likely be met with disdain. Who are we to them? They might think, "Your achievements have nothing to do with me!" (laugh)

And since it’s driven by underlying defilements, most people simply won’t appreciate it.

Talking about unhappy things—yes, this indeed spreads negative energy.

When we are unhappy, it usually stems from aversion. Spreading our defilements and negative energies to others of course won’t be welcomed.

Besides our friends and family, who see us as "theirs" and share in our sorrow, virtuous people will also be compassionate towards us and help us. They won’t mind our negative energy because they possess strong positive energy themselves and won’t be pulled down by us.

"Sharing your failures, others think you’re foolish.

Sharing your successes, others think you’re arrogant."

Both statements are true. Our successes and failures are not relevant to others. When we fail or make mistakes, strangers might laugh at us and think we’re foolish. Success won’t make them happy either.

Why? According to the Buddha's insight in SN 56, most people in today’s world lack morality.

"In the end, we find that no one really wants to know or care.

Everyone just likes to talk about themselves.

People prefer to communicate with those who share similar experiences and thoughts.

It’s all about a sense of resonance."

That’s right! Who do we love most? According to the Buddha, it’s ourselves (laugh) [UD.41].

You can never be as important to them as they are to themselves.

The closer we align with their "self" and their interests and happiness, the more important we become to them, and the more they want to know about us.

Why do people chat with each other? Oh, that’s right—it’s to satisfy their own ego and feel important, seeking recognition from others. Ultimately, it’s still selfish.

So, continuing to cycle through rebirth is pointless because human nature is like this.

Those who cannot see clearly may think it’s wonderful.

But once you see the truth, you realize that people are indeed a fire pit.

Everyone is selfish and wants to feel important.

Our importance will never surpass their own.

When we talk about our good and bad experiences, it often comes from our own ego, wanting to feel significant. So usually, others will find it off-putting.

Instead of expecting others to satisfy our ego,

it’s better to completely remove it.

On the contrary, we can satisfy their ego and selfishness

by bringing love and joy to them.

This way, we won’t be hurt , and we’ll make them happy. Plus, no one can criticize us anymore because we’ve entirely removed our selfishness and ego.

這個是一個threads 上一個公開賬號所發的，有些道理，而且因為他是公開的，所以分享出來，以下是書面語版本：

【人大了發現

和人分享開心事，對方會覺得你炫耀

分享不開心事，對方會覺得你發放負能量

分享自己的失敗，對方覺得你蠢

分享自己的成功，對方覺得你驕傲

最後發現其實沒有人想知道想理會

人人都只喜歡說自己

人都只喜歡和經歷想法接近的人溝通

為的只是共嗚感  】

在這裡拆解這段文字。

【和人分享開心事，對方會覺得你炫耀

分享不開心事，對方會覺得你發放負能量】

誒，其實沒有錯。向別人說自己的成就，自己的好；如果一般人來說，99%是我慢來驅動，覺得自己比人好，的確是炫耀（笑）

只不過我們的朋友，我們的家人把我們當成’他們的‘，所以他們才會為我們高興。其餘為我們高興的人是品德高尚的人。

除了以上這幾種人，我們有成就跟他們分享，一定會反感。我們是他們的誰啊？他們會想：’你有成就你好關我什麼事？‘ （笑）

而且因為背後是不善的煩惱去驅動，所以基本上一般人是不會欣賞的

和人說不開心的事---誒，這的確也是在發放負能量，沒錯啊～

自己不開心，其實是嗔心來的。把煩惱傳播給別人，別人自然不會喜歡。

除了我們的朋友，我們的家人把我們當成’他們的‘，所以才會和我們一起憂愁，會幫助我們。品德高尚的人也會悲憫我們，幫助我們，開解我們，不介意我們的負能量--因為他們本身正能量很強，不會被我們拉倒。

【分享自己的失敗，對方覺得你蠢

分享自己的成功，對方覺得你驕傲】

都沒有錯。因為我們成功還是失敗，都不關別人事。

我們失敗闖禍，和我們非親非故的一般人就會當笑話看，取笑我們，覺得我們蠢。成功也不會為我們開心。

為什麼？ 參考佛陀在SN56中的啟示--這個年代的世界絕大部份人都是沒有道德的。

【最後發現其實沒有人想知道想理會

人人都只喜歡說自己

人都只喜歡和經歷想法接近的人溝通

為的只是共嗚感  】

沒錯～ 我們每一個人最愛誰？佛陀說是自己（笑）[UD.41]

你好永遠都不及他自己好。

當我們越靠近他的’自我‘，越和他們的利益快樂有關，我們才會越重要，他們才會越想知道

一般人和人聊天是為了什麼？ 哦～沒錯啊，是為了滿足自我，讓自己變得重要，想獲得別人的認同。說到底，還是自私呢～

所以再輪迴投胎下去是沒有用的，因為人性就是這樣。

看不清的人會覺得很美好

一看請真相就會覺得人群根本就是火坑來的

每個人都是自私的，都想變得重要

我們的重要性一定不及他們自己的重要性

我們向別人說自己的好壞，許多時都是我慢來驅動，想讓自己變得重要。所以通常別人也會反感。

與其期望別人去滿足自己的重要性，我慢

不如將它完全去除

反過來滿足他們的我慢和自私

把愛和快樂帶給他們

這樣既不會讓自己受到傷害，同時也能讓他們開心。而且沒有人再能批判我們了，因為我們完全去除了自私、自我。